Eclipse

It was better than the first two, but that's like saying a hot poker in the ear is better than a fishhook in the eye.

Eclipse is the third movie of the Twilight saga. (Only one more to go!)

All the characters are back, Bella, Edward and Jacob.

Bella/Kristen Stewart is still as annoying as all get out.

Edward still has the big vampire hair.

Jacob is like Captain Kirk - he finds ways to always be without a shirt.

The best part of this movie, well all three movie so far, is Bella's dad. Billy Burke offers some much-needed comedy in this trash.

So why watch these films if I hate them so much? Simple: I enjoy torture. This is like watching movies like Attack of the Killer Tomatoes or something; you end up laughing so hard at the horrible acting and the dreadful writing.

At least, with this movie, you get some good acting by Bryce Dallas Howard. She does a great job at being a vengeful vampire. Although her time is too short. Dakota Fanning, however, doesn't fit her role.

This film is good for frisbee golf and cup holders.